Kairos Weekend in Review

Boy, I am just not entirely sure where to start.  God is just amazing and I am blown away each time I am involved with something like this.  The experience of this past weekend is really hard to summarize in words, but I will do my best to do this.

I will admit that when I started this adventure (and it truly was in many senses) I really had no idea what I was getting into.  All I knew is that every time Dean (attends our church and this weekends leader) talked about Kairos he always beamed.  It was evident that he believed in it and was totally committed.  I just really felt this was a great opportunity to take another step on this journey of missions work.  Now that I have come through my first Kairos weekend, I know beyond a shadow of a doubt this was a supernatural experience. It is  one that further confirmed mine and my family's calling to serving ALL of God's children in tangible ways and sharing the Gospel with them. Let me try to recap for you the events of the weekend. In most cases I will not mention names as to protect the integrity of Kairos and not single anyone out.  My point in sharing the following things is not to praise anyone individual person, but rather give God all the glory.

On Thursday we arrived at the Church where we would sleep around 2 pm.  There was a lot of anticipation in the air. I got a chance to chat a little with another first timer and we were both a bit nervous. Not so much about the actual weekend, but rather more so because of the unknown.  We entered the prison and headed to the chapel. I was really in observation mode.  I was just trying to let it all sink in.  We spent some time getting things setup and getting ready for the evening and meeting the residents. Finally the time came for the residents to begin to arrive.  The team formed a tunnel for the residents to walk through. One by one each resident was announced and as they were we all clapped and cheered. This was the first act of Agape (unconditional love) we offered to them. This was part of the overall process of helping them know and feel important.  Each resident was greeted by their Host (a team member) and served coffee, tea, water and cookies.  The host and resident spent some time getting to know each other.  We had a short list of questions to help in this process.  Once all the residents arrived and got settled we spent the rest of the night introducing ourselves to each other. Each team member and resident had their turn.  During this time there was a few residents who caught my ear by their response to why they had signed up for Kairos. I think perhaps the one that spoke the most to me was the one resident who said "I came to Kairos to find out who this God person is."  We did get answers that ranged from coming for the food to getting to know God better.  We finished the evening with prayer and headed back to the church to turn in for the evening.  Upon returning to the church we debriefed a bit and prayed for the next day.  Sometime near 11:30 I went to bed.

Friday morning early (5 am) we were all serenaded to "Oh what a beautiful morning....." by one of the team leaders.  I am not sure many of us were ready to get up, but it was time to get going.  After a brief breakfast which included serval cups of coffee we were on our way.  Once arriving at prison we got processed and got to the chapel and got setup.  The residents began arriving and we had another chance to get to know the residents better. I was able to get some coffee and chat some more with my hostee.  I was beginning to form a relationship and learning more about him.  It was cool to just chat with him and see him open up. At this time the residents were introduced to their table family.  This consisted of 5 other residents and 4 team members. Much of the rest of the weekend was spent with their table families.  I was a member of the worship team so I was not at a table.  This was both a challenge and a blessing.  The challenge was still trying to form relationships and connect to the residents while not partaking in most of the conversation times.  It was difficult for me also cause I tend to fade into the background in times like this.  The blessing was really two fold.  The first is that I could sit back and observe all the tables. This allowed me to observe the events of the weekend as a whole and not be restricted to one table.  The second blessing was that I was able to really concentrate on a couple individuals and get to know them through unstructured events.  It was really cool to see how the Lord directed the weekend and led me to certain residents.  It was neat to be able to let the Lord direct the entire thing.  I think on day 1 one of the first wow moments was when I walked into the storage room for all the cookies and this 10 by 12 room was filled with boxes stacked floor to ceiling containing cookies. It was  the first time during the weekend I felt the presence of the Holy Spirit. The fact that so many people took time to bake cookies and pray over them is so awesome.  You could feel the love in the room.  As the day went on the story of the Kairos weekend began to unfold.  The first talk of the day "Choice" set the stage for the rest of the weekend.  It challenged us all to examine the choices we make. Are we going to react in and emotional response and have to take what we get or are we going to respond with a thought out response and get want we want out of situations?   As the day continued you could sense the Holy Spirit working.  As the day went on the Agape team hung a banner around the room that had all those who signed up to pray for each time slot throughout the weekend.  The banner went around the room four times!  What an awesome testimony and expression of love!  These residents could begin to see that they were loved.  It was also so overwhelming to sense the Holy Spirit.  For me to see so many people were praying, it just energized me.  Several times throughout the weekend I became overcome with emotion when I glanced at the prayer banner. It was one of the most powerful moments for me.  On this day I also got to be a part of a really awesome and eye opening event. I was a part of the cookie delivery team.  In groups of 4 we went to all the cell blocks and delivered two dozen cookies to each resident and worker.  During this time the block was locked down and went door to door delivering the cookies in person to the residents.  What an eye opening experience to see the conditions in which they live.  While it was clean, it was cramped and two men were living in a room intended for one.  It was also amazing to see how the Lord was using cookies to minister to every person there.  It was neat to see how a warm smile, gentle welcome and cookies can go a long way to minister to these folks, many of which experienced unconditional love this day for the first time in a long time.  As the day continued we spent time listening, sharing, eating and socializing.  The events of the day, while scripted, also were influenced by the Holy Spirit. It was evident that the Holy Spirit was at work and working in the hearts of all.  We left for the evening around 8 pm and returned to the church.  This night was filled with many letters being written. Part of the responsibilities for all team members was writing a letter to each resident who attended (36 total).  This is another way to show the residents love.  Many folks had to finish their letters this night and one stayed up all night finishing. During this time there was great fellowshipping going on and an overall sense of the Holy Spirit still working.

On Saturday we arose early again (5 am) and were off to the prison for the second full day (third overall). After the groundwork being laid out the day before, things started getting a little deeper.  The talks were centered  around getting to know God better and Forgiveness.  At the beginning of the day we were given a piece of paper to begin thinking about people we needed to forgive.  We were encouraged to really think about whom we may be harboring anger or hostility towards.  It was interesting to see the residents wrestle with this.  Forgiveness is something really hard to accept and give.  And yet it is absolutely essential to all relationships including those with other people and ultimately with God.  During this day it was also awesome to see some table families began to bond. The concept of table family was an important step for most.  A lot of the residents had some semblance of a broken family life. So it was hard for some to open up. It was hard for them to trust each other. For the most part the residents did not really know each other at the table. They were often from different blocks and different groups.  Also in prison, as in the outside world, it is not easy to trust someone else let alone open up and be vulnerable. In fact a sign of weakness can be particularly troublesome for the residents.  Seeing them open up and be vulnerable to others was an awesome thing to see and moving for sure.  At meal times the residents ate together as tables at ODR (officers dining room).  Because seating was limited not all team members ate there. On Saturday I had the opportunity to eat both meals with the residents.  This was an awesome time to eat with them and strike up some general conversation as well.  I particularly enjoyed this time as with no agenda I could really understand their lives a little better. I also got to ask some more personal questions about life at the prison, family and anything that came up. I also got to share more about my life.  It was a chance for me to tear down some of my walls, deal with some preconceived notions and just be real.  As the night came to a close we had a forgiveness ceremony. At this time each table family and all the group members entered the chapel and put our piece of paper (with people we had to forgive) in a bowl of water. The paper disappeared. This was a very tangible example of what happens when we ask for forgiveness from God. As soon as it is asked for, it is given and forgotten.  In scripture we were reminded that as far as the east is from the west so far has God removed our transgressions from us!  We also had an open mic night where residents could get up and share what they were learning and what the Lord was doing in their life. There were many who shared and a few stuck in my mind the most.  The Lord was moving in the hearts of the residents and in their lives. They were so thankful for the time they had.  They were looking forward to sharing what they learned with others. It was a great ending to an awesome day!  I am just so thankful for what the Lord was doing in these men, our team included.  It is so great to hear from the residents and some that I had wondered what was going on for them, shared some great things. God is so good!

Sunday I arose eager to go and excited to to see the Holy Spirit build on the past days highs and continue His work! More talks were given and further discussion times followed.  The table families all had really bonded by this time.  Something else the table families did at different times was enter into a private prayer time.  They all prayed for each other and to God.  From what I heard it was really moving.  By mid day Sunday the table families all had grown close together.  Each resident was really into the weekend and very much engaged. We continued to hear more talks and do a lot of worship though music.  In the afternoon there was a series of six instructional talks. Part of the followup to these weekends is weekly prayer and share meetings on Thursday nights. During the six instructional talks, the ground work was laid for these weekly meetings.  I had the privilege of giving the talk about sharing joys and concerns with each other.  It was a truly spirit filled and directed time. It was funny as I had my talk prepared for nearly 6 weeks.  However after this weekend I felt led by the spirit to share some different things. About 1/3 of the way through my talk I completely went off script and shared some personal experiences from the weekend including some heart felt love that I could not have possibly prepared myself for prior to the weekend. By this time of the weekend I had a genuine love for these men and wanted nothing but the best for them.   We concluded with a celebration service where outsiders could attend and hear about how God touched these residents life.  Also attending were Kairos graduates from past weekends. It was neat to see the previous graduates there praising the residents from this weekend. Another great visible example of support.

In conclusion I would like to attempt to capture the essence of this weekend and what am taking away. I would say the biggest thing I learned from this weekend is how awesome God is.  He can take a band of brothers who are broken vessels and can use them to reach a group of men that are in such desperate need of Christ's love.  I also learned that the people we went to served can be used by God to minister to us.  Before this Kairos experience, I was not aware of the double standard I often times applied to my life.  I was not aware of how judgmental I was.  I often times had preconceived notions of individuals in my life and those I cam in contact with that influenced how I viewed people and judged them.  It was not till the third training meeting that I truly began to see this.  I am ashamed at how I acted.  I really believe initially that this experience would fit nicely into "My" vision of missions.  I believed I could really do something nice for these residents and bless them.  God used this experience to rock my world.  He broke down so many walls in my life and in the process brought some really amazing men into my life. Some of these men reside in the outside world, and some reside in TCI.  I am so grateful for this experience. The Lord has certainly taught me a lot. He has confirmed my passion for missions and sharing the love and truth of the gospel with those in need. He has confirmed the desire to lead my family in a missions minded and missions centered life!  If I am being honest I have no idea where this will lead. But what I am sure of, is I cannot wait to see where it goes.  I truly believe I am all in at this point.  I am totally committed.  My prayer going forward is that I would not lose sight of this vision or this Kairos experience.  I strongly encourage anyone reading this get involved in Kairos. If it is not Kairos then something else that forces you to get out of your comfort zone and rely totally on the Holy Spirit to guide you through. It is when we are most vulnerable that the Lord really begins to work.   In closing I will leave you with this thought.  Look for opportunities in life that stretch you and force you to move out of your comfort zone and rely totally and completely on God. For when we are weak, He is strong.

Humbly serving Christ,

Gary

Video journal day 3

Another awesome time! The Lord is at work in the lives of all the people at this weekend. I am eager to see tomorrow and how these men are changed.

Overwhelmed and overjoyed

What a powerful day today. The Lord is at work and reaching people for his kingdom. Enjoy the brief video journal below.

Video journal day 1

What an awesome day! The Lord is good for sure. Enjoy this short video diary of today.

The power of prayer...

I have always been a firm believer in prayer.  But this past weekend I took part in a prayer circle that was both the most emotionally draining and uplifting time ever.  What a blessed time it was.

I attended a mini-retreat with other members of my Kairos family as we prepared for our upcoming time in Trumbull Correctional Institute (TCI).  We will be going into the prison starting Thursday afternoon.  We participated in several team building activities.  The first night we all joined in a foot washing ceremony. This type of ceremony is one of the most humbling things one can do. To voluntarily wash another persons feet and allow them to wash yours was truly amazing. Later in the evening we prayed for each participant from TCI.  Each participant has a host (a member of the Kairos team) and this member prayed for them.  We ended the evening with our traditional circle time which included prayer and singing 'Surely the Presence of the Lord is in this Place".  It was a blessed evening.  After many went to bed a small group of us sang worship songs being led by Marcus Troyer. Marcus is the worship team leader. It was an awesome time of corporate worship.

The next morning we woke up early to eat and mingle with other team members.  We then got together and listened to one of the talks that would be given over the weekend. The point of this talk was about the barriers we all put up between us and those around us.  The reading goes on to describe this man whose barriers started small but eventually cut off all contact with the outside world. That was until someone threw a flower over 'the wall'.  The rest of the talk focused on breaking down these barriers.  It was a powerful talk for sure, because we all have barriers.  Undoubtedly this will be a very difficult challenge to overcome with all the residents this weekend. The last part of the weekend was spent in our prayer circle. During this time each team member prayed for all the other team members and we were prayed for by all the other team members.  This time was incredibly powerful. While it was emotionally challenging and draining it was one of the highest points as well.  Many of the concerns for the weekend seemed so much smaller now. While I know it will still be a challenge and the devil is still on the attack I feel much more confident.  Prayer is powerful, powerful indeed.

So as this week goes on and Thursday gets closer, please continue to pray. There are so many details that still need to fall into place for sure. Pray for the leadership team as they make sure these details work out. Pray specifically for the residents of Trumbull Correctional Institute. Pray that the barriers in the way of them hearing the gospel will be broken down.  Pray that even as I write this the residents will feel the tugging on their heart. Pray for the team members for safety, protection and rest. And pray most importantly that the Lord's will be done. It is my desire to see many saved this weekend. I am so excited to see what the Lord is going to do.  What an exciting time for sure!

May God Bless You All!

Gary

To God be the Glory!

As I prepared for another Kairos meeting I must say I was exhausted.  This past week was the first week of School at Marlington (where I work) and being in the Technology department was exhausting.  There was really no major issue just lots and lots and lots of little ones. By the end of the week I was exhausted and coming down with a cold that is presently kicking my butt.  So as I laid in bed friday night I began to wrap my mind around the events of the week. So many times in life when I get busy I tend to put my head down and attempt to get things done.  I focus so intently on my to-do list that I lose sight many times at what really is happening around me.  I tend to focus on one thing that is 'yelling the loudest' to get my attention.  That is what happened to me this week.  Work was obviously yelling the loudest and received a majority of my focus for sure.  So much so, that by the time I reached Friday I realized I had not even truly thought about Kairos prison ministry one bit. This feeling of regret overwhelmed me that night.

But isn't that how things usually go?  I mean no  matter how many blessings we have, or how much you want to focus on 'something for jesus', our mind gets distracted by the everyday stuff of life.  I know for me as the 4 day event for Kairos approaches (11 days away), the stuff of life creeps in takes control of my thoughts and focus.  How easy it is for me to get distracted from what should be my focus.  And that focus is God.  I have been reminded several times this week that we cannot do this thing of life on our own. In fact no matter how hard we try, our heart seeks whatever makes it happy at the moment. We are sinful people and, without God's intervention, will seek the things of this world in an effort to make us happy quickly.  You see, our purpose is to bring God glory. But with out his divine help, we will constantly seek after the things of this world. I have started reading a book called "The Grass is Greener Conspiracy".  The basic premise that our hearts are always seeking what appears to be greener grass on the other side of the fence.  The author's main point is that without God's help, even for the desire to want to glorify Him, we will always look to the next thing of this world to seek happiness.  So it should be not surprise to me that these next 11 days are some of the busiest for my family in quite some time. We have soccer practice, dance practice, awana, visiting friends, birthday's to celebrate and many more.  It would be so easy to focus on how busy we are and not of God.  My prayer is that as the devil ramps up his attacks on my family and all those on the Kairos team, that we would turn our focus to God.  You see, the truth of it is God's work is going to get done.  The question is this.  Are we striving to bring Glory to Him through our everyday life or are we seeking after the treasure of this world?  My prayer is that God would give me the desire to want to Glorify Him with my life so much that I will not even notice the stuff of this world.

Faithfully Serving Him,
Gary

The rope of life......

Heather sent me a link to a video yesterday.  It is a video of a sermon illustration used by Francis Chan (author of Crazy Love) and was really awesome.  Here is the video. Take a moment to watch it and keep reading after that.


Isn't that right to the point! I love reading/watching/listening to Francis Chan cause he holds nothing back.  He gets right to the point and lays it all out there. This is so true. So many of the decisions we face every day we answer based on the red part of the line! We as Christians miss the point. I know I do.  This time of year for me at work is crazy as I have mentioned before. I have worked more hours this week then for two weeks most any other time of the year.  That in itself is not wrong. We are called to work as unto the Lord. The question I need to answer is am I working as unto the Lord or am I working for myself or my boss?  Wow, not that is hitting below the belt for sure.  As I was reminded by Heathers recent blog entry (click here to read it) I work to serve the Lord first and others second. The longer I walk down this journey of life the more I realize that some times it is not what we are doing but rather how we are doing it that matters.  So many times I got stuck on being in the right place or being in the right job that I missed the point.  It is how I live where I am at or how I work in the job I am at that matters. Don't get me wrong, I need to listen the Lord for direction and be open to new things, but I need to live my life as if it is one big worship time to God!

So as I enter into this last weekend before school starts, I need to live my life with eternity in mind. My prayer for everyone is that we can keep the main thing the main thing in our lives and that we can live a life of Worship for God!  Remember to live your life for eternity and not the red part of the rope!

--Gary